The Blog from Pickle Road

  Hey Violets!

I’ve been on a roller coaster since Monday.   Bring on the hooch, mama! 

Oh, look what a got in the mail today!   Another variation of one of my mystery quilts.  By Sharon at Road to California. 

It’s so different from the other!   

 Well Turtles, I bought this out-of-print cross stitch chart from eBay the other day and it came TODAY!

It’s an out of print design by my friend, Betsy Stinner.  I adore her but I don’t think she’s designing cross stitch right now.  She had a bad bout with cancer a few years ago and, thank God, she’s cancer free now, the last I’d heard.   You would love her.

 Betsy is the designer of EARTH THREADS which are my favorite cross stitch charts to stitch.  They are small, but not too small, manageable and easy to do and they look terrific when worked up.   I have several hanging around the walls of Pickle Road that I’ve done.  

 Anyway, Betsy and I were in almost constant email contact while she was designing these pillows and she ended up allowing me to name the pattern and then — surprise — she dedicated it to me.  

I couldn’t stand seeing it for sale on eBay so I bought it.   When I opened the package, well just a rush of fond memories came pouring out.   I wanted to share that with you.    You can check out some Earth Threads charts (all are out of print) at my fav-0 cross stitch on-line shop, Stitches n Things (they have EVERYTHING cross stitch).   You can also see some great Earth Threads stuff by Googling the name or checking out eBay. 

  Look what Kathy Brown, designer of The Teacher’s Pet patterns (click here to go to Kathy’s web site) sent to me today.   A Gambino’s Mardi Gras, Ship-a-Cake Party  that you decorate yourself, with the colored icings and sugars that are included, along with Mardi Gras beads (EVAN QUOTE:  “Are these the beads that the girls get and show their boobs?“) and coins and lots of fun stuff!    Make sure you check out Kathy’s TAKE FIVE pattern! 

Forget the hooch.  Pass the cake!   Doesn’t this look like fun?  Thank you Kathy! 

xoxom

I read in the newspaper today that our own quilting Marie Osmond (by the way, I really LIKED Marie’s fabric lines but they didn’t get much press) is going back on daytime TV with another talk show.   Well you can bet that it’s not going to be about quilting.   Don’t think it’ll ever get mentioned.   Not unless you want to hear remote controls clicking channels from coast to coast. 

   Before I continue, I want to say that I LOVE MARIE OSMOND.  How can you NOT love Marie Osmond?  I love everything about her.  EVERYTHING!  Always have.  Always will.   But she described her new show as a giving women a place to go to cry.   Now here’s the quote: “It’s nice to have a destination to cry.”    Surely the women of daytime TV America are not so screwed up that they have to turn on a television show to cry!  

“Next on “MARIE”:  Appointment Crying!”   Click here to read the article in the New York Post.

If you want a good cry all you’ll have to do is pick up a TV Guide and leaf through it.  If a listing all of the terribly shitty programming that’s shoved down our throats every day and night won’t make you sob hysterically, then watching Marie’s show won’t even cause a moist eye.

 NOTE TO MARIE:  Find yourself a new producer and FAST!  (and I’m only telling you this, sweetie, because you’re one of us).   

 Mark Lipinski’s Quilter’s Home

Today I’m finishing up writing the next issue.  It’s going to be a marathon weekend.  The trip to California really took it out of me.  That said, in looking over my notes, this should be another good issue.  

Pickle Friends and Foes:

Click here to read the Wildcard Quilts blog.  I love this lady. I’ve met her and well, she’s just a terrific person.

I have Book-itis

I just ordered a slew of books from Amazon.com (I love that site).  Some are brandy new and some are used (I buy a lot of the Amazon.com used books without ever having had a problem).   

   This is Mary Lou Weidman’s book called Whimsies & Whatnots.  I have another of her books and this one looked really interesting.  I think she’s the greatest and very talented.   You know what?  I wouldn’t be a bit surprised, now that I’m looking at this image again, if I don’t already have this book in my  studio (I literally have about 800-1,000 quilting/crafts books)!  LOL  Yeah, I think I bought this one once before!  I have so many doubles of things that I love, you wouldn’t believe it.     Maybe that will all settle down after my lobotomy. 

I was turned onto this book at Road to California by a Pickle.   It’s a great one but I’m not telling why.  You’ll have to read the next issue of Quilter’s Home.    I got the last used copy on Amazon for $30.00.    YIKES! 

I liked the cover of this book called, Textiles:  A Handbook for Designer —  and that was enough for me to get it.   Now that I’m designing fabric I should begin to understand the process.   Although I must say, while designing for Troy I found it fascinating to briefly learn of the different processes involved and I loved my Troy fabric.

  I own and use Adobe Photoshop (the super big version) so buying this pricey book, Adobe Photoshop for Textile Designers, seemed a good choice.   Now, if I’ll only crack it open, I might be able to do some good work!  LOL 

   I also ordered a book (without a cover photo) of, God help me,  Fashions of a Decade: The 1980’s!   Hysterical!   Madonna fashions!   High heels and anklets!   Walk Like an Egyptian, ladies! 

 Califon inches it’s way to the press

This morning, Jeff and I met with Northcott designer, Ro Gregg, to go over final versions of Califon that will debut at Spring Market.   Pretty exciting.  

   This is designer  Ro Gregg and she hates having her picture taken (I can relate).   She’s talking to the Northcott Sales Manager, Bernie in Lyndhurst, NJ! 

  This is Ilse, Ro’s assistant and partner in design crime.   So sweet with a hysterical sense of humor (which sucks me right in). 

Meet Marco, Ro’s Dog.  He’s so friendly and cute but wouldn’t stand still for the photo! What a cuuuute face! 

 Designing fabric is like having a baby.   The first one will always hold a special place in your heart, but the others are equally as important and you love them all for very different reasons. 

  On the way home, Jeff and I stopped for Chinese in Mendham, New Jersey.  I had General Tso’s and Jeff had Hunan Chicken.  We both hated our soup. 

Evan just got home from school and he’s getting ready for a swim meet tonight.  It’s gonna be a late one, dudes! 

Web “Sitings”

Here are some websites that had been forwarded to me that are either friend or foe of the Pickles.   Take a look by clicking on their names! 

Patty Sky Pants

Art Quilts and Other Adventures by Suzanne Earley

Putting the Pieces Back Together

Later, chippies!  xoxom

The Hunterdon County (NJ) Courier News recently did a story on my home quilt shop, Kindred Quilts.  Click here to read the article.  

Here’s the photo that accompanied the article.  There’s a Katmandu quilt hanging on the left! 

Now I know it’s not the New York Times, but this writer needs to get her editorial shit together.   We wonder how the old lady stereotype is perpetuated — just read between the lines of this article…”Quilting Bees?”   Is she kidding?  Any writer worth their salt could have — SHOULD HAVE — done a bit of research into modern quilting and/or found a new, unique angle.   What are they teaching in journalism classes these days anyway?  BURN HER!  LOL   

 (wouldn’t this graphic make a terrific and exciting art quilt?)

Now, I’m thrilled that Kindred Quilts had an article featuring the shop, but given the way it was written I doubt if any potentially NEW quilters will show up.  It reeks of the mothball stereotype.  Quilting bee, indeed!  How very dare you!

Jeff went to a birthday party in Manhattan yesterday and ran into an artist, Agnes de Bethune.   Agnes has given it all up to paint.  Her speciality is oil on canvas flowers.   Honestly, I would swear that her painted flowers look like photographs! 

Here is an example of Agnes’ work called, Early Crocus       

Click here to go to Agnes’ web site to see more of her work.  

The latest issue of McCall’s Quilting is about to hit the stands.  

I am gushing that my name is on the front cover of McCall’s.   It means that the magazine has confidence that they can sell magazines because my name is on the front.   I’m kinda blown away and humbled.   Really I am!    Now you HAVE to buy it.

On the inside is a pattern for my Mark’s Matrix quilt.  I had named it Moroccan Tiles.   I had designed this quilt ages ago from Benartex Crystals fabric.  You can get a kit, I’m sure from O’Susannah’s Quilts and Gifts (click on their name for more information on their shop and or this kit) in Watkins Glen, upstate New York.    Sue Murphy and her gang actually pieced this huge baby for me.   It’s pretty spectacular in person.  I’m not sure the photo does it justice.  

 Also, my buddy, neighbor and fellow guild member, Amy Bell Buehler, has a quilt pattern in this issue made from Katmandu fabrics.  I just love this quilt.   

Blog “Site-ings”

Here’s a Canadian website that mentions the Pickle Monster.  Click here to read it.

 Later, acorns!  xoxom

Hey Pumkins!

So we have a new Miss America.  And boy can she butcher a song (maybe that was the talent).  When she sang ‘OVER THE RAINBOW’ I almost had 2 hurl ‘over a bucket!’  And the poor dear’s a music major.  Dogs all over the USA were hoooooowling with giggles.   BUT her evening gown was spectacular.   It’s the one she’s wearing in the photo as Miss Michigan.   I can’t seem to find a full length photo of it — yet — but it was beautiful and she wore it well.  

I was thinking that Miss California would get the title and would have been an excellent choice.

But I LOVED Miss Washington (just like Evan, she has two dads), Elyse Yamemoto.

 Now maybe I just got used to seeing my fat body, but these girls in their swimsuits, well, they’re just too damned skinny.  Really, not very healthy looking.   If I were their parents,  I would prefer seeing a little, just a teensey weensy bit, more weight on those waxed and lotioned, skeletal frames.  Miss Washington seemed like the only one with a thin, but normal, weight, in my always humble opinion. 

I wanted to share a Mark Lipinski blog siting.  Gina Halliday’s Quilter’s Buzz.  It’s really a terrific blog all about the quilting community.   It’s a great blog to subscribe to.    Here’s me sitting with Gina, wrapped in my precious Islamabad quilt.  Click here to see it.

What an honor.  I got the most amazing telephone call from New York quilter (and hot designer) Karen Griska.         Karen makes amazing quilts from yardage selvages.    

Karen asked me to write the Foreward to her new American Quilter’s Society book!  I am so flattered and honored.  

 Here’s a pic of some Pickles after dinner in Ontario, California.

  This was such an excellent time!  

This is Sue’s quilted shoe.  Neat-o, dude!   

 Take a look at one student’s preliminary Simple Simon quilt.  Stunning in person and made from Kaffe Fassett fabrics.   I loved it.   The photo does it not justice!

  Here’s what Pickle, Patti Brown did with her Mystery Quilt blocks!

I love the leaves and butterfly applique!

Later, dude!  xoxom

Mark Lipinski and HRH Evan Lipinski 

  I’m writing today from the Centenary College swimming pool where Evan is working out with this high school swim team. Of course, there was a knock down/drag out in the car because, although I

was driving, he knew the better way.    My car won’t go through buildings and shouldn’t drive over gardens. But he knows better. Always does.   So I kicked his little ass out of the car and let him walk while I found a parking space and still got to the pool before His Highness did. What a dope. I would have settled for a simple, “Thanks, Dad, for driving me here.” But noooooooooooo.

HIT THE ROAD (to California)

I’m finally back from Road to California. Whew, what an amazing show and venue. If ever you can ever get there, get there! Carolyn Reese and her staff run some wonderful, over the top, show. Folks, the vendors can make you drool. So many stalls with a gazillion wonderful fabrics and notions. Bring your credit cards and worry about your mortgage later!
   McCall’s editor, Beth Hayes, told me that I’d love this show and she was absolutely right!

I stayed at the Doubletree Hotel/Ontario, right across from the airport.

    It’s a beautiful place, clean, good restaurants, but it’s one of those Building 1 through 4 places that you have to take an elevator from one floor to the next to get to the next building only to have to get back on the elevator and go down and or up to get to where you’re going. Not a great place if want to avoid burning cardio calories (and who is that type?).

If you call for something from the front desk, or security, it can easily take 15-minutes or more before you see someone. I had to deal with security for missing items or for door locks that wouldn’t open with my card. Let’s just say if a guest really, really needed security for something like a knife-wielding wacko, the entire floor would have been brutally murdered and the wacko gone before security could get from Building 1 to Building 3.

The story of how I stayed in 4 rooms in 3 days

After being up for almost 18 hours by the time I got to the beautiful and easy-as-pie Ontario Airport, I checked into my room and turned on my A.C. Clunk! Clunk! Clang! Grind! Clunk! Oh dear, something ain’t right. Every 45-seconds on the dot: Clunk! Clunk! Clang! Grind! Clunk!

Hoping that the AC was just “warming up,” I waited for about a half hour before calling the front desk to ask them to move me to a different room. I had not unpacked. That would have been too easy. Instead, they sent a repairman. It’s a 15-minute job. I decided to take a walk, see the flowers in bloom (I can’t fricking wait until New Jersey gets her flowers back), then God spoke to me and guided me directly to IN & OUT BURGER! I wept. What a find! Thank you, Jesus! Praise the Lord!

When I got back to my room about an hour later, I put my pass key card into the door slot and opened my door ready to dive into bed – stuffed with a fattening but out-of-this-world (heavenly) Double Double Burger (two burgers and two slices of cheese), fries and shake (I’m serious. I’m going back to church based on IN N OUT BURGER alone). The air conditioner was laid out all over the room. Shit.

I called the front desk again and asked to be moved. Just then the repair man came in, put the air conditioner back together and all is well. I took a cab to a steakhouse to meet with some fabulous Pickles

and slept until the next morning and left for my class. Being the “green machine” that I’m becoming I turned off all of the lights, the AC and hung my towel to dry before I left so that I could use it again.   Wednesday, I taught my Simple Simon class which was a hoot. I loved the California girls! One was better and more interesting than the next.

Later that evening, after dinner, jet lagged and ass dragging I went back to my room. My room key wouldn’t work. Nada. Red light. Goose egg. I called the front desk from the hallway and waited 15-20 minutes until security got there to let me in.

Once inside, I took a shower and turned my AC back on. Clunk! Clunk! Clang! Grind! Clunk! Clunk! Clunk! Clang! Grind! Clunk! Every 45-seconds! Clunk! Clunk! Clang! Grind! Clunk! Just like the last time. I called the desk. “MOVE ME!”

  An hour later I was moved to a new room on the floor beneath me. I packed up all my shit and took an elevator ride to my floor , got in, unpacked all the stuff, watched some TV and (with my trusty Ambien) hit the sack. 

I was totally exhaused.

When I woke up, the toilet in the NEW room had completely overflowed! Disgusting. I hadn’t even USED it and you can’t belive what was coming up!

I called the front desk to be moved but OH NO. “We’ll send a repair man.” I was already just about late for my Katmandu class by the time a different repairman made it to my room – 3240. I told him that I had to leave and rushed to the convention center. I asked him to lock up. 

Another long but UBER fun day. I had fallen in love with the Road to California show. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE. A FABULOUS SHOW. NOT TO BE MISSED.

When I finally made it back to my room that night, beat and ready for the sack, my door key card wouldn’t work again. SHIT! So off I lumber to the end of the hall to call the front desk from hell from the hall phone.
 

“Your name please, sir?”
“Mark Lipinski. L-I-P-I-N-S-K-I”
“Well, Mr. Lipinski, you’re in room 3246.”
“No. I’m sure it’s 3240.”
“I’m sorry, Mr. Lipinski, but you’re in 3246.” Am I fucking losing my mind? I know I’m tired but damn…
Off to 3246 I go. My room key wouldn’t work there either. Nada. Red light. Goose egg.
“Listen, you. I am SURE I’m in 3240.” We’ll send up our security.

15-minutes later, my arms full of a quilt top and bolt of Andover fabric (for tomorrow’s class)  and a bag full of 3 large and different, gloriously sequined OUR LADY OF GUADELUPE’s,  and a Guadelupe rubber stamp    security finally shows up….but not to open MY door but 3246 even though I was insisting that I was in 3240. Twilight Zone, kiddies. Just the Outer Limits. In the meantime click on this line for a great site I just found for your own Lady of Guadelupes!

  Just like Angelina Jolie in “Girl Interrupted” I played along. Good behavior gets you out of the looney bin. I set my load down in the hallway and when “security” opened the door to 3240 the room had been obviously untouched. My laptop wasn’t there. My clothes weren’t there. The gift of  fresh picked oranges from the yard of California PicklePuss Sue  weren’t there.  

“MAAAAYBE because I’m in room 3240 (“asshole” –way under my breath)”

Oh the knocks security made on the room 3240 door. Now THOSE knocks could have awakened even Heath Ledger!   No answer (just like at Heath’s door). Security opens the door with the master key. Lo and behold, all of my working papers, computer, etc. is all over the desk. “Thank you, God. I am not crazy!” (this calls for another IN & OUT Double Double. Hell, make that a TRIPLE!) 
He leaves. I go to check on the bathroom (yuck!). The FRICKING TOILET IS UNPLUGGED FROM THE WALL WITH AN ‘OUT OF ORDER. DO NOT USE’ SIGN ON IT. Can you stand it?!?
I call the front desk. This time I ask for the manager. I get the “manager on duty” (which means you can wipe your ass with the amount of their authority).

I can move to a suite – Building 1. Oh shit. All I want to do is sleep. It’s late.

“Oh no, sugar. YOU can move me to a suite in Building 1. I’m going out for an hour (IN & OUT BURGER). I will pack my stuff and you can move me.” I was all but asleep on my feet. I packed, AGAIN and off I went.
When I got back, I stopped at the front desk to pick up my new key.

The room was fabulous (just click on the thumbnails) – but at what cost?

I realized the next day, as I gathered my things for my Friday class that my Lonni Rossi fabric quilt top, bolt of Andover geisha fabric and $130 of my purchases were gone. Nowhere to be found. Who other than a quilter would have stolen it from the hallway   which is the last place I remember it when security and I were playing “Where’s Your Real Room.”

So I got a room upgrade – which cost them nothing, a bottle of champagne (I don’t drink), and vouchers for a few breakfast buffets. I’m out a lot of $$$.

Now what do I do?

MANHATTAN QUILTZILLA STRIKES AGAIN

A Pickle forwarded me a very nice blog entry regarding tips she got from my interview on Annie Smith’s podcast. Look who responded - the ass-breathed Calendar Girl   – yes, the previously mentioned blogger, Manhattan “Calendar Girl” Quiltzilla strikes again. Take a look by clicking HERE.

Does this woman not have a life? Apparently being cooped up in a tiny Manhattan apartment with no friends (other than her computer) and a bad attitude makes for non-stop sociopathic acting out.
One little pill a day could change this woman’s whole life perspective. Of course, she’s the type who only thinks that OTHER people could benefit from psychotropics. We know she hates “large” people and “loud” people and, well, most people, but posting something like that on a stranger blog is not only bad manners it’s kinda’ psycho. In her defense: Maybe her diet pills are wearing off?

BLOG SHARING

Speaking of blogs I found a few who have mentioned Quilter’s Home, Katmandu or me, recently. Take a look.
This fabric store (AbbiMays) blog/site is very well done. Not just because it’s my fabric but THIS is how an online shop should sell their fabrics. Make it an event, not a listing. This shop could probably sell anything! Bravo!   Take a look at their Katmandu Video by clicking here.

 Click here to read Cherold’s Place’s Blog about Katmandu

Novmber 26th Entry of City Girl Quilts Blog mentions Katmandu

AbbiMays has a Katmandu pattern!

C&T PUBLISHING COMPANY

  After some very minor negotiation, I have finally signed my contract to write 2 books for C&T. I know I’m going to be busy but these are books that just need to be written. I’m thrilled and eager to start right after I put this next issue to bed. The titles, et al, are top secret. I’ll let you know just as soon as I can.

MARK LIPINSKI HOME for NORTHCOTT

  The new line is coming along fine. Jeff and I are hard at work on it. Our designer friend (designer and Martingale author), Amy Buehler came by this morning to give us another eye. Poor Amy had to sit through my and Jeff’s disagreement on color/scale. She’s like family, so she was cool. Jeff and I rarely argue – only over creative differences.
I have to admit, that while I love KATMANDU, I like this new, CALIFON, line better. I have also been inspired today for my next line. I’m excited about it. Ideas just come to you in the strangest of ways, don’t they?When are you most receptive to inspiration?

Hey Clamatoes!

I’m writing this to you from somewhere between Dallas, Texas and Ontario, California.

After all of your suggestions, I took a connecting flight with a 40-minute layover (which by the time they started boarding, I barely made it) in Dallas, rather than flying into LAX and being stuck in LA traffic trying to get to Ontario.  

This is what you see when you exit the baggage claim area and through the windows of the airport.

  I was told that they are the Big Bear Mountains.  Stunning!

I did have a chance to read a bunch of things (and even bought a new book while running from one flight to another – verrrrry OJ Simpson – before he murdered Nicole and got away with it).  

The two books that I juggled on the plane were:

  Michael Toliver Lives by Armistead Maupin.   I read his Tales of the City series in the San Francisco Chronicle or the Examiner when I first moved to Baghdad by the Bay (probably not the most beloved nickname these days) in the late 70’s.  

  I even took a gay lit class given by Armistead Maupin at San Francisco State.   Now that I’m old, I can’t say that I remember the story lines of the original series as well as he does – so I may have to go back and reread (like that’ll happen).

   I found Release Your Brilliance by Simon T. Bailey on an airport kiosk.  Now how can you pass up a title like that?  The premise is “The Four Steps to Transforming Your Life and Revealing Your Genius to the World.”    Someday, I’ll get a handle on life and what I can contribute to the world.   I’m getting pretty antsy because at 50, time is running out.   I haven’t made my “mark” so to speak and there is so much that the world needs.  I struggle trying to find my place here, to inspire and to unite and well, do something rather than just sitting here.   It’s very frustrating to me.   I have this inner need to do something that will count before I die.  I just don’t know what it is…. So I pick up books like this to help focus and guide me.  

I like to think of it as kind of a spiritual/psychic bank account (which reminds me that I’m kinda sparse in my literal bank account as well).   Anyway, the more good stuff you put into your head, when you need it you will have something to draw on.  That doesn’t mean that it will make the “test” easier, just that  you have more tools at your disposal – theoretically.

Let’s see, I have my trusty iPod with me.

Here’s what I listened to . . .

·         At 6 AM I started with Louise Hay’s Evening Meditation.  It knocked me out for 2 hours.

·         Wagner’s Greatest Hits (because I’m a LARGE person who likes composers with LARGE egos and LOUD music   LOL )

  Richard Wagner (Large composer)

·         Britney (of course)    (Britney Spears:  Large problems)

o   My Perogitive

o   Crazy

o   Oops, I Did it Again

o   Baby, One More Time

·         Abba

·       Alicia Keys

·         Annie Smith’s after quilt market Podcast 

·         Alex Anderson’s before Thanksgiving Podcast 

·         MorningCoach.com – more podcast positive thinking crap

 JUST LANDED…MORE LATER 

So I get my bags at the airport (oh my gosh, Ontario is painless) and called the hotel name that I was given, Country Suites.  I wasn’t registered.   So I called another area hotel with a similar name.  Not registered.   So I gave Jeff a call to check out the notepad where I had originally written down the information.  Yup, Country Suites.   I called again.  I’m not there.  So I had Jeff call the quilt show office.   I’m at the Doubletree.

So I go back into the airport to the courtesy phones, and within minutes I was in the hotel van.  

The Best Western van!  

It wasn’t until I got to the Best Western front desk that I found out that I was registered there either.  I called Jeff again.   So Jeff says, “I never said Best Western, I said Doubletree.” 

The Best Western van brought me to the Doubletree.  I was registered there.    And my view – the Ontario Convention Center.   Well, the back of it at least.   

I love the palm trees – even if they are in a parking lot. 

Oh, I ran into Susie Osburn at the front desk.  Susie  was a Baum designer but she told me that she had just left to join Blank (scoop alert!).   I think the design team at Blank is terrific.  

Once I got into my room and logged in, I found a link to ANOTHER blog review from the Empire State Quilt Guild.   Click here to read it.   While you’re there, take a look at this quilter’s creations.  She’s one talented cookie!  

Oh, here’s  my room.    

This is the carpeting outside of my door.  I think it’s an incredible inspiration for an giant applique quilt, don’t you?

It’s easy to remember the room number because it’s the same as my weight! 

Later sweeties! xoxom

Hey Turnips,

I took Evan to the mall yesterday.   He needed to get his cell fixed.  God knows what he’d do without text messaging. 

I wanted to show you the horror that is my child in public.  He loves his pants long and, even though he covers his drawers with his shirts, I KNOW what’s under those shirts.  I coerced him to lift his shirt to show you!  Amazing.  What a skinny little thing!  

While we were at the mall (Bridgewater Commons) I found a few things that I thought you might be interested in.  

Take a look at what was in the J.Crew window…

A cute patchwork skirt.  

A quilt block design fabric shorts.  

Then, while Evan was trying on shoes I found these patchwork Converse shoes in brown and in pink. 

I loved the white on this blue top and it inspired me to a two color appliqué.

Then, look at this (speaking of embellishment) look how easy a running stitch with a clear sequin can make your bland fabric shimmer.  It’s really easy to do and will really add a kick to your quilting projects.

I loved the colors of this bright little skirt.   Of course this is a size zero.   It could look like the Amazon Jungle in a normal size. 

And, punkins, this is what’s new in tween wear.  Apparently clothes to hide a baby bump.  These were in the window of Limited Too.  Hideous for everybody but the preggers 15-year-old.   Inspired by Jamie Lynn Spears, no doubt.

I bought a few Yankee Candles that were on sale and one that wasn’t.  Shit, they’re expensive, even on sale!  I bought Egyptian Cotton World, Stargazer Lily, Cottage Breeze, and Midnight Jasmine.   Oh boy, Pickle Road will smell like a whore house! 

Speaking of whorehouses, last year, for my birthday, Jeff and Evan bought me a $100 gift certificate for a massage for what I thought was the very nice massage center in Chester, NJ.   Of course, Jeff found a massage place that had just opened behind the toy store in a strip mall — and not the one I was thinking of.   I never went because 1. It wasn’t the place I wanted and 2. It looked like a front for a massage parlor (Poor Jeff - he never thinks of these things).  

Well, they were shut down recently.  Yup.  Prostitution.  Can you imagine me on the table when it was raided!  LOL  I would have had to murder Jeff!   What’s worse, the girls would have HATED me.  They’d really have to give a massage! 

I HAVE A QUESTION FOR YOU

You know,  are you guys being accosted by Dead-Sea-Salt slinging, kiosk workers at your local malls?   These fricking idiots are relentless.  Everytime you walk by, they jump out at you.   The one here is called NATURE’S BEST but from what I’m reading on the internet, they are called all kind of brands, at mall kiosks, and have been linked to possible spy rings to illegal immigrant trafficking, and more.   All you have to do is GOOGLE, “ Dead Sea Salt, Kiosk.”  You’ll be surprised what comes up several pages in.   I sure was.  

A lot of people like the products.  But I’ll tell you this, these Dead Sea slinging idiots are the most aggressive, rude and  arrogant group of people I’ve ever come across…and, according to the net, it’s like that in every mall where Dead Sea kiosks are found.  

If I wanted to be approached and followed and called out to, I’d go to a outdoor flea market, not a top-priced mall.  I hate it.  Everytime I pass the kiosk, I get called to or approached and I’m a fat ugly old man.   I may boycott Bridgewater Commons Mall.   If the malls can’t control their kiosk stalls or turn a blind eye to how they’re run, then I’ll go somewhere else.  

Bye babies….off to Ontario!  xoxom

Hey Cupcakes!

It’s just a few days before I leave for California! Can’t wait! I have a lot of last minute things to wrap up (like printing patterns, handouts, and stuff like that). I also have to pack the quilts I’m sending west for my lecture. I needed them yesterday for a trunk show/lecture with The Empire State Quilt Guild in Manhattan.

Here are the Katmandu kits that were shipped out yesterday. Jeff is filling out the Fed Ex forms in the dining room.

  While I was in our dining room I took a pic of this little vignette. I love this butterfly head. It really works with the wallpaper and is just kinda weird. We found it in Frenchtown, NJ (which is right on the Delaware River, north of Lambertville and across the river from Bucks County, PA.)

Ah, Manhattan. How I love the smells and energy and the buildings. I always get a tad homesick when I’m there. I don’t go often enough anymore despite I live a stone’s throw from the Hudson River. I told Jeff that we’re going to do a once a month trek to the city to keep up with the trends, etc. Hell, Evan learned to walk on 43rd Street and ate his first SAND-wich (literally) at the playground in Central Park. He used to walk around Manhattan like he owned it and, at three, could tell you how to get from midtown to Chinatown without missing a beat.

Here’s me driving into the Lincoln Tunnel.

Here’s me inside the Lincoln Tunnel (which kinda sounds like the title of a gritty NY porn movie).    Can you imagine what the cars all around me thought as I snapped my own fat-faced picture while I sped through the tunnel?  

I actually got on the street parking right across the street from the guild’s meeting location!  A miracle!  I almost licked the ground in appreciation!

   This is where the guild meets.  8th Floor.  Very New York!  LOL

The hall at F.I.T. was packed. It was hard to maneuver as a speaker as there was traditional audience seating in front of me, then lots and lots of tables and chairs, like a dinner theater, beside me. So I was never sure quite where to look, how to play the crowd, and if they could even hear me.

Here’s the room (kind of blurry – I screwed up my camera – Evan fixed it for me later that night but too late for the NY experience).  You get the idea. 

I don’t know why, but I was nervous. Talking in public rarely affects me that way. Maybe because it was a hometown crowd. And wherever I lecture (and even when I was doing standup comedy or stripping) the audience is always the same. You have those who embrace you and get into the spirit of it. Then there are those who want you to prove yourself to THEM. They sit there stone faced and just kinda stare at you – psychically mocking you – make me laugh, you’re not so hot, I’m above all of this. There were a few of those. Ironically, dispite the “New York reputation” real Manhattanites aren’t like that. They are some of the most generous, fun, easy going people I know. Now transplanted Manhattanites are a tough bunch and it takes them YEARS before they become less frenetic like their native New York neighbors.

Here’s the drive out of Manhattan last night….

First, I had to get on the George Washington Bridge on the way back to New Jersey. 

Then I stopped in Fort Lee (where we owned our first house) and took a photo from the street behind our old house).

This is a random photo (meaning I didn’t take it) but it’s so lifelike that I wanted to show you how New York really looks from New Jersey).

YIKES!

Click this for a link to a review of my lecture that showed up in my email this morning. I’m not sure how I feel about it (she nailed me on some levels– which I find amusing) –

     –  but I think this broad fits into one of the “I’m above it all” transplant groups. Actually, as I read more of her blog, I did like some of her writing and her musings.  This is one of those examples, however, where your average blogger juuuuuust starts to boarder on QUILTZILLA!  Oh well, I guess I AM a public figure now and open to whatever people want to write.  So, in that spirit, I’d like to say:  I HATE DR. PHIL!  LOL

BACK AT THE RANCH

 Before I got home I met Jeff and Evan at the Longhorn Restaurant. It was an hour wait (for heart attack food no less) but we LOVE the 9 Pepper Steak Salad. I hadn’t had a thing to eat all day (besides two diet Cokes and two coffees) I was starving (although if I ate off of my own body fat I’d live for another 3 ½ years).

  Cold and over the wait among screaming babies and out of control running/climbing toddlers (with parents who weren’t watching them), we loaded up the truck and we drove to Cloves – our favorite Indian restaurant in Mt. Olive. It’s sure as hell not what you’d call affordable (and a long shot from Longhorn prices)—over $100 for 3 of us.

No matter the cuisine, Evan always chooses something that looks like or could double for Fajitas!

I had to take a photo of Jeff. He’s always wearing a baseball cap. I think he’s too old for the “Leave it to Beaver” look 24/7.

He disagrees. 

PICKLE POSSE YARD SALE BOOTY

I got the books that I ordered from the last Pickle Road Yard Sale from Terri (the first of every month). I am really, really happy with the books I got. Here they are for your drooling pleasure. 
Click on them to see larger images. 

We bought a new supersize printer this weekend for fabric designing.    It’s an Epson R1800

It has 8 color cartridges (which sucks) but photos printed on it will last 200 years!  No fading.  You can also print really super long things.  As a matter of fact, rather than using regular paper we’ll be using ROLLS of paper!  Neat-0.

Here’s Jeff trying to figure it out in his office! 

PODCAST ALERT

Oh, I got a note from podcaster supreme, Annie Smith!  She wants to do a telephone interview with me tomorrow - I’m going to reveal something that you budding designers and textile dreamers will be very interested in.  Stay tuned!

 Later, Pickles!  xoxom

   Since the secret is already out of the bag, here’s the actual press release (along with my new logo) that went out on Friday.   Take a look by clicking on it to get a full size copy to read.  xoxom